You look like who you like

Have you ever noticed how couples who have been together for a long time, tend to start looking alike? Well, you are not fantasizing, its true! A scientific study carried about by the psychologist Robert Zajnoc and his colleagues and published in the paper “Convergence in the physical appearance of Spouses” (1987) details a long-term experiment that shows participants pictures of men and women in their first year of marriage and the same couples after 25 years of marriage. The 110 participants of the experiment are asked to figure out which of the couples are married to each other. Judging by facial features alone it was possible for most of the participants to correctly judge which of the faces were couples. The conclusions of the experiment and further extensive research was that couples facial features usually began to resemble each other the longer they were together. The researchers suggest that this is because of empathy. When you empathize with someone you subconsciously begin mimicking and copying their behavior and facial expressions. 

I agree with this but would like to suggest that there is a little more going on. Because psychologists don’t usually learn or use spiritual terms such as “the law of attraction” and “energy transference” their means of communicating what is really going on is limited. But I have been teaching since 20 years that “You become what you give your attention to”. What you put attention to for extended amounts of time, you become an energetic, vibratory match to. This is why, in my article The Secrets of a Face, I suggested that you can read someones character and personality best after the age o f 40. 

Of course this also reveals that the secret of beauty cannot be found in cosmetics with its multi-billion-dollar hype. You cannot purchase beauty. But if you give your attention to what is beautiful, you will become more beautiful. And you can make it much stronger if your attention is imbued with empathy or appreciation of whatever it is you keep looking at. 

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