How Emotions Create Reality
How Emotions Create Reality
Whether people drink alcohol to reduce their social shyness, register at an online-dating forum seeking an affair or go to a meditation retreat seeking enlightenment, they are all essentially looking to get back to the Garden of Eden, to the infant state of being comforted in the bossom of the womb or the Universe. As mentioned in Infancy vs. Spirituality growing up is probably better than forever trying to return to the womb. Yes, it is pleasant to get that warm and fuzzy feeling of alcohol, it is pleasant to suck on that cigarillo and feel at once at ease and it is probably interesting to snort a line of coke and feel all inhibition built up over a lifetime just fall away from you. But it would be much wiser and healthier to be able to create these states from within. Those are longer lasting and dont make you helplessly dependent. “Creating these states from within” has to do with getting in touch with your Emotions…accepting and welcoming negative emotion – as a teacher – and still endeavoring to feel positive emotion.
Like attracts like and that is why it is so much easier to maintain something good you already have than trying to achieve something good you do not yet have. Nearly everything you do on “normal” levels of consciousness is driven by the desire to feel better and avoid feeling worse. You think that if you do this and that, you will feel better. “If I land this contract, I will feel much better”. “If I meditate every day, I will feel much better”. “If I convince these people, I will feel much better”.While this way of thinking has some merit as a motivational-tool, projecting too much “well-being” onto external circumstances will tend to make you slave to them. Life is not a path to follow but one created by your own footsteps. Well-Being or Happiness are then not some goal, but a starting point, not the end, but the means. Instead of saying “If I get him/her to be my girlfriend/boyfriend, then I will feel really good”, we say “If I feel really good in the first place, independent of “getting” someone, I will be more attract-ive”. This goes back to what was said in the article “Wanting vs. Having“.
Before trying to “get” something, why not start with your state? Are you feeling at ease, centered, strong, ready to go? Those desires you think you have, may not even exist anymore when you get back to your natural state of power. When you change your level-of-energy, your goals change. To improve your state, shift your focus from stuff that is not working to stuff that is already working, from what you cant control to what you can control, from what you do not have to what you already have. A mirror wont smile before you smile, life wont be better before you are better. The Journey to be taken is an emotional one foremost. Do not let the weather or other people or your bank account statement dictate your mood. Create a pleasant state first and all good things will follow.
Releasing negative emotions, following intuition and similar cannot be solved by intellectualizing and rationalizing. The mind has many answers but it does not have the answers to lifes deepest mysteries and never will. The mind can interpret energy but it cannot directly experience it. Your emotions are the direct experience of energy. Neither can it be solved by relying too much on others for guidance.
Negative emotion is a friend, not your enemy. It is an early warning system so that you can change your path long before something bad manifests. Most times negative emotions are simply saying: “If you do not change your course, something bad will happen”. Positive emotions are saying: “Follow this direction”. This general rule does not, of course, count for external manipulation of your emotions. It’s a good thing negative emotions and doubt exist…otherwise you’d easily head toward disaster without knowing it. One important distinction is that of legitimate negative/positive Emotions and that of neurotic or manipulated negative/positive Emotions. When you murder someone and later feel guilt over it, that is legitimate, existential guilt. When you are looking after an attractive person in the streets and you feel guilt over it, that is neurotic/indoctrinated guilt. When you feel ecstatic while dancing, that is legitimate ecstasy, when you feel ecstatic after popping a few pills, that is manipulated ecstasy. Yes, of course dancing is also “manipulated ecstasy”, but there are varying degrees on a scale from 1-10, where “ecstasy by meditation” would be 1 and “ecstasy by whiskey” would be 10 and “ecstasy by torturing animals” 15. The general simplified rule is that if you transgress against yourself or other lifeforms, your negative feeling about it is entirely legitimate, an integral part of humanities survival program. When you feel depressed after 5 years of mostly watching TV as a couch potato, your depression is entirely legitimate, something that is actually positive and actually trying to tell you to change course. When you therefore feel negative emotion, before attempting to handle it, check whether it is existential (legitimate) or neurotic. If it is legitimate negative emotion you will have to make amends for some wrong-doing or very radically change direction.. If it is neurotic negative emotion you simply release the emotion, let go of it, dissolve it or shift your focus to something more positive.
a) Change the Thought, Belief, Intention or Judgement or
b) Change the Plan, Action or Surroundings
Apart from the question “Is this an existential/legitimate or a neurotic Emotion” that leaves you with only two questions when feeling low:
1. What must I be believing/thinking/focusing-on in order to feel this way?
2. What must I be planning or doing to feel this way?
So you either change the way you think about a situation, or the situation itself. It is advisable to try to change your inner attitude first and then, if that does not seem to work, to change the action or environment. For example you might be at some party in someones house and feeling really ill-at-ease. You then notice that you may be feeling low because you have a certain judgement of the people there. So you release that belief and try to view the people with more interest. If your bad feeling in that house still does not change, even after you have changed your beliefs, that is because the energy-level of the place is inherently low or the people there are just generally a mismatch to you. So then it’s time to try option #2…to just leave. One of both will offer you relief.
Of course your attitude may also be “It is not my goal to feel better but to make new experiences”. Thats certainly a fun attitude to have, but even that can be overdone with undesirable psychological consequences.
In general, the human body/mind system is designed to be a barometer, pointing at thought-patterns and behaviors that are or are not appropriate for you and what you want in life. Let’s say you are working on a project that at one time felt right but now no longer does. According to Reality Creation Coaching, you only have two options: Change or abandon the project, or change your thinking about the project. Any of the two will put you back into flow. You first try to change the way you view, think about, talk about, believe about, label and judge the project. If that does not create significant progress (and most times it does), then, after a few days (not weeks), you change aspects of the project itself. And if after a few weeks (not months), that does not improve the situation, you abandon it. Thought travels the quickest. You change your thoughts about something and that will reflect in reality in only 2-3 days. Anything that creates relief or renewed zest or more love or more challenge or more joy is spiritually and psychologically healthy.
You will not and should not get rid of negative emotions as such. They are the perfect navigational tools that allow you to stay in sync with your souls originally intended path. Getting rid of negative feelings altogether you would no longer be able to discern, choose and make sense of life.
Emotions are energy flowing through the body. When the energy flows through a negative or positive belief or action filter you perceive the neutral energy as either negative or positive emotion. Fear and Joy then, are both merely energy, the same energy even, flowing through different behavior or belief filters. It is therefore not the energy you should get rid of – another big misunderstanding in humankind. You want to find out what the filter is and the emotion helps point you toward that filter. The reality-filter is either inherently positive/negative (see Levels-of-Energy), or it is made positive/negative by your own thought (see The Reality Creation Technique). Some emotions that show you are in soul-alignment:
Elation, Euphoria, Humor, Enthusiasm, Eagerness, Embracing of Challenge, Appreciation, Love, Compassion, Interest, Attentiveness, Awareness, Admiration, Relaxation, Relief, Peace, Contentment, Calm, Courage, Joy.
This is the opposite of what 90% of most Pop-Psychology , Self-Help and even “Law of Attraction” books teach. Most think that Courage is the opposite of Fear. I teach that Courage means moving forward despite fear. Most think that you have to wait to feel good before you act. I teach that by acting in the direction you prefer no matter how you feel will get you into a better state or into the flow quickly. Willpower puts Consciousness or the “I” over Emotions, so that you are not at the effect of what you are feeling but rather the creator of it. This principle is demonstrated in Part 7 of the Reality Creation Course where I start out in a state of Boredom and talk myself into a state of Ecstasy within only a few minutes.
Spot an unwanted emotion and ask yourself: “What must I be thinking to feel this way?” and then write down the thoughts that come to mind.
Then, take a thought you wrote down and assume that it is a “level 2″ thought on a 1-10 Scale. Next, downgrade the same thought to “level 1″, making it sound and feel worse. Pull the idea down intentionally. A “level 2″ thought might be “I feel unattractive” and pulling that down to level 1 might be “I feel like a flabby, grotesque monster”. Exaggerating a thought downwards puts it under your conscious control and can also spark some healing humor.
Next, create the same thought on “Level 3″, just make it a little more positive or a little more neutral. If the level 2 thought was “I feel unattractive” the Level 3 thought might be “Well, I’m not yet a beauty queen, I guess”. That is the same idea expressed more positively. Because it is much easier to take steps on a gradient, you get in touch with level-3 before going to level-4. The “Level 4″ thought would be significantly more positive, but still realistic, for example “If I work on myself some, I can be more attractive” Do not formulate the “level 5″ thought “I am very attractive”. It won’t stick, it won’t work. Chose thoughts you can actually feel are real. See also: The Focus Wheel Process.
Level 2: “I feel tired very often”
Level 1: “I’m so exhausted I might as well die”
Level 3: “Sometimes I am in need of a nap”
Level 4: “I would like to align my nutrition and physical movement as well as my thoughts to gain more energy”
Level 5: “I am wide awake and energetic”
(Level 5 should not be used by beginners, Im only adding it here for demonstration purposes).
When you change your vibe about something and then uphold, accumulate and cultivate that new thought or feeling, physical evidence of your new reality must follow sooner or later.
The idea of this Meditation is to embrace and allow the negative and yet still move upwards. The more often you practice it, the more emotionally competent you become.
Exercise 5: Memory
Remembering certain places, people and events can give you access to positive emotions you may have not felt in awhile. You can remember a time you were having a really good time. While you remember it you get back into sync with that same energy, thus warming it up again…which may lead to similar happening once more in the future.
Want more friends? Remember the times you had the most friends. Want more money? Remember the times you made the most money. However, remember without remorse or the feeling that it’s “long gone”.