Reality Creation Coaching teaches that dieting causes overweight in the long run. Experts on nutrition, diet and weight all presuppose that dieting is the way to maintain ideal weight. This belief is taken as a given, without question. The only controversy is over what diet is the right one. But if you look at real life experience you will notice that dieters are the ones usually struggling with weight. And you might say "Well of course! Thats why they are dieters. Their struggle with weight has caused them to become dieters!". But I am saying that their dieting has caused them to struggle with weight even more. I am saying that if you become a dieter, you will struggle with weight for the rest of your life. I guess this is an "outrageous" statement to make, but if you looked at the real-life and long-term experience of people as carefully as I have, you may also find it to be true. If you are overweight then somewhere along the way, someone told you that you have to keep paying attention to food and weight, and you bought into this belief.
The country with the most books on dieting also has the most obese people. You might think that obesity caused all those books, but I am suggesting that all those books also caused obesity. From reality creation coaching I know that cause and effect is a two way street. Obesity causes books on dieting and books on dieting re-affirm and cause more obesity. This is, once again, the principle of attraction by which you get more and more of what you focus on.
Dieting causes more overweight is because it exerts resistance. One of my core teachings is that what you resist will persist. This holds especially true for food. In dieting you are conditioned to say "no" to eating, "no" to having sweets, "no" to hunger. This works fine for awhile, but in time it subtly draws your attention more and more into the things you are saying "no" to. Subconsciously and by law-of-attraction everything you are saying "no" to, you are actually saying "yes", because you are directing attention to it. Sitting in a room where there are some snacks and some beautiful paintings, any non-dieter would be focused on either the snacks, the paintings on something else, but the dieter would be subtly focused on the snacks because of all the importance he has given the subject of food. Thus it takes more and more willpower and energy to resist that which is seen as a "temptation". Its easier for a non-dieter to maintain good weight because they dont walk around preoccupied with food. The dieter is in the bizarre situation of needing energy to resist eating and then needing more food to get this energy.
If you examine dieters you can see how a diet works at first, as long as you stick to the rules imposed by the particular diet, be it TLC diet, atkins diet, weight watchers, DASH diet or any of the other thousand offers out there.The problem is that most of these diets cannot be upheld consistently, over long periods of time. Some of these methods require you to monitor yourself and what you eat and how many calories foods have every day. I dont know anyone who has the will to keep that up for the rest of their life. As soon as they stop monitoring themselves, their weight not only goes back to what it was before but often much higher than before because of all the suppressed/resisted energy that has accumulated over time. But this also contains a little hint on what a more effective diet would be: If you chose a method of monitoring yourself that is easy to maintain for the rest of your life, then you can keep ideal weight. If you chose to improve your weight gradually, in very small steps, over a long period of time, you can keep ideal weight without the backlash. Quick weight loss and radical change are not good because they deprive the body of energy. And since the "body never forgets" it will pay you back by putting on extra weight. So you have already learned the first secret of psycho-spiritual weight loss: Lose weight only very slowly, over several months. In this way you program a new vibratory frequency into your body and being without overwhelming your system. You more easily become accustomed to better weight. And you dont worry about fluctuations in weight, because you have given yourself plenty of time. You release the pressure (the resistance).
Another problem with dieting is that external rules override your inner sense of when you have had enough food. The body is perfectly equipped to tell you when to start and stop eating. But with all the dieting and all the schedules and rules, this inner sense gets lost. And the moment you break your own rules, you are left without guidance, including the intuitive and physical sense that you overrode for so long. Dieters are usually on an elevator all of their lives going up and down with their weight continually. They deprive themselves of and deny themselves the food they want and get a backlash later on when the pendulum of polarity swings to the other side and they ravage their fridges. People who diet have given up their own inner source and rely on external reality to guide them. Thus, they eat not because they are hungry but because its "time for dinner". Or they refuse eating not because they are not hungry but because the diet-plan tells them not to. Living by external rules is necessary only for people who have lost their connection to source. Thus I have just shared with you the second secret of maintaining ideal weight. And that is, cease external imposition, cease all dieting, cease all rules.
Listen to your heart when its talking to you. Feel your body and sense what it needs and what it doesnt. Also note that there is a big difference between being hungry and craving. Food craving comes from inner emptiness or emotional problems that should be addressed with
releasing techniques. Emotional-Releasers have a much easier time keeping ideal weight without much extra effort. When you feel such cravings I recommend you do one of two things: Either sit down and breathe/feel into them. That means to put your attention into the areas of the body that are craving and to consciously feel and relax them. You will feel emotional charge lurking right behind those cravings. Those emotional charges release by feeling them. Being hungry on the other hand is a natural function of the body that should not be suppressed or overriden. Being hungry does not insist on sweets or an exaggerated amount of carbs (lower your carb-intake after 6 oclock, if possible. After 6 oclock the body winds down and does not need that many carbs). Hungriness is also happy with
other foods than sweets.
The other method to deal with cravings is to tell yourself "Alright, I will have sweets (or whatever you are craving) to eat, but a little later". This is the third secret of psycho-spiritual weight loss. With the way this thought is phrased you are neither exerting strong desire ("I will have sweets now!") nor Resistance/Denial ("I wont have sweets at all"). You are saying yes to sweets, but "a little later if I still want them then". In saying "yes" to sweets you are tricking the mind into non-resistance. As it imagines eating sweets, it already relaxes some of its craving. Having something to look forward to keeps it calm. So if you are serious about losing weight you must condition yourself to think not in terms of "Yes" or "No" but rather "Yes, later". Delay of gratification works better than denial of gratification. Denial will most certainly backfire. This is the core reason that dieters are just getting fatter and fatter with each decade.
To repeat the first three principles:
* Aim to lose weight slowly over a long period of time, realistically and gradually.
* Give up dieting and resistance and eating by external cues.
* Instead of saying "Yes" or "No" to cravings, say "Yes, later".
The fourth principle of weight-loss is self-respect or love. The cycle of failure for dieters usually looks something lime this:
a) Intend not to eat sweets
b) Upholds intention with utmost willpower
c) Has a relapse and eats sweets
d) Because of this one relapse, says "Ah, what the hell" and eats even more
e) Gives up the intention entirely
The two mistakes made are in a) and d). The first mistake, in a) is to state an intention or goal based on resistance. "I will eat no sweets" is a resistance-goal that can only be upheld with a lot of willpower/energy.
The second mistake d) comes from a lack of self-respect. People who respect themselves, say "Alright, you had one relapse, but thats alright. You are forgiven. Now back to my intention". People who do not respect themselves put themselves down for having a relapse. And as they put themselves down they lose more energy and then give up entirely. You can have a relapse either be a reminder of the goal or a reason to give up. Its your choice. Here is a better way to go about the whole thing:
a) Intend to maintain "OK" weight over a long period of time, without dieting or too much effort
b) Practice a little self-control and awareness but dont overdo it
c) Make an intention of how you would prefer to react to relapses and temptations (instead of placing the intention never to eat sweets again, visualize how you want to react and behave in specific situations)
d) If a relapse occurs, forgive yourself and enjoy the food. Continue with your intention after the relapse
c) Instead of radical and quick change to the better and then to the worse, enjoy the fruits of long-term commitment.
Another reason the long-term view is beneficial is because it teaches you to love yourself as you are. You need to accept yourself as you are rather than trying to force yourself to be like the covers of magazines. Its good to have good looking role models as long as it does not turn into self-criticism if you cant immediately meet those standards. Being fat does not necessarily mean you are weak, it primarily means that you dont understand how the law-of-attraction works. The "law of attraction" as taught in movies such as "The Secret" and numerous bestselling books is watered-down to the point of being dishonest. The law of attraction works as follows: If is much easier to maintain weight if you are already slim. But if you are not slim, you will have to invest plenty of conscious effort into it. That includes what was already discussed here but it can also include body movement, working out or sports. As you workout, you build a stronger belief. All physical action builds belief. In doing so, it will be easier to visualize that you are losing weight and to respect yourself. So do not assume that you have to become like the woman in the picture above without effort. That is setting an unrealistic goal and is sure to set you up for disappointment and even greater weight.
To repeat lessons 4-6:
* Respect yourself and dont allow relapse to turn into giving up.
* Rather than setting unrealistic goals, set specific intentions or visualizations for how to react in certain situations (such as at a party that has a bunch of snacks, or when you relapse)
* Add physical movement and the joy of being a physical being to the mix. But again, do not overdo it, that will only backlash into the opposite. Chose a program you can follow for years, not a program that is so difficult you will only follow it for a few weeks.
You cannot win with resistance. Everything that reduces resistance and strengthens belief is helpful. Goals that are too high, dieting, overstraining, unforgiveness, living by external cues, suppressing emotions as well as denial of gratification (rather than delay of gratification) build resistance. Gradual improvement, realistic goals, no external rules and diets, self-respect, following your inner sense and a little self-control and physical action as well as
emotional clearing release resistance and get you back to the state of flow that is normal to people who never began getting concerned about food and weight in the first place. And by the way: Similar applies to other areas of life.
If you have been able to maintain ideal weight over long periods of time (after having been overweight) or if you have gained benefit from what was described here, please comment on this article and share your experience. Also recommend this article far and wide and help your fellow humans create the reality they prefer.
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